Understanding Minimizing Thinking (and How to Avoid It)
There are many cognitive distortions that you or people in your life might be dealing with. These cognitive distortions can bring struggle and strife to conversations, relationships, and development. Understanding these distortions, how you can relive them, and the reasons for them can prevent unnecessary conflict and begin healing early on before more serious problems arise.
One of the most common cognitive distortions is called minimizing. This happens when someone takes a situation and “brushes it off” or ignores it because they think that others are out to get them or simply don’t understand. Often, people who minimize do not want to take ownership of a situation or want to stay stuck in their negative behavior patterns. They inevitably minimize another person’s thoughts or feelings regarding certain actions, words, or relationship patterns.
Minimizing can also happen when someone refuses to see the positive in themselves. If they do well they might think that it was a fluke and they wouldn’t be able to replicate the situation, or if they receive a compliment they will tell themselves that the compliment-giver was “just being nice” and didn’t mean it.
People who minimize situations can be helped by learning to see the opposite—often more positive—side of something.
For example, if a person fails a test that they worked hard to study for, they might say to themselves, “That test wasn’t important anyway and the class and professor were just out to get me. I don’t need to worry about it and I’ll just quit the class.” A healthier thinking pattern would go more along the lines of, “Wow, maybe I didn’t understand the material as well as I thought. I can ask for some extra help or resources outside of class and I know I’ll be able to try again on the next assessment.”
Re-train Your Brain
The brain is a muscle that can be exercised to think in certain ways. If you are constantly thinking of and concentrating on the negative aspects of things, then the brain will seek those out and learn to only focus on the negative.
However, the opposite is also true. You don’t need to ignore negative thoughts, but you can acknowledge them and then actively look for the positive. Turn a situation around and look for the silver lining or how a struggle can turn into something good. If you focus your mind on the good things in life—and assure yourself that they are there—your brain will learn to seek out those good things and reap the benefits.
Mental health professionals often remind their clients that if they are struggling with minimizing (or its counterpart, magnifying), that the problem is not with them as an individual. They can help their client understand the feeling by referring to looking at a situation through an altered lens, which, if removed, can help the person see something more clearly.
Don’t Forget
If you or a loved one struggle with minimizing, practice turning a situation around and looking at the other side. Remember, too, that seeking out the help of a mental health professional almost always has benefits that can prevent further problems down the road.