The Four C’s of a Healthy Relationship

By Pooja Mamidanna AMFT (103485)

Relationships requires patience, time, and hard work. This applies to any relationship you hold in your life, be it a professional or personal one.

Something that I learnt from my therapist and like to educate my clients on are the 4 C’s that constitute a healthy relationship:

1.CARINGNESS

It is important to show mutual respect and authenticity in your relationship. This will help strengthen your relationship.

2.COMPASSION

We need to be empathetic and kind to other individuals. As the saying goes “you must treat others how you wish to be treated”.  

3. COMMUNICATION

It is imperative to not use degrading language, paying special attention to our non-body language (making sure your tone of voice matches facial expressions), and it is useful to communicate in I statements.

If you are not getting something from a relationship, it useful to communicate with others what your expectations are, what you want/need, and what is currently missing from the relationship.

As human beings are not mind readers, despite having known someone for years, months etc. you need to communicate what you are thinking and feeling.

4.COMMITMENT

A relationship is built on trust and honesty, once that has been broken it becomes harder to heal from this. 

When utilizing the 4 C’s think of it as a new seed you have just potted. In order for the plant to grow you need to care, nurture and nourish it. Over time the sapling grows, gaining leaves, branches, and stronger roots. It becomes healthy with the right handling and care. Such are human relationships as well. 

Resources:

THINKING ERRORS

https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/cbt-thinking-errors.pdf

REFLECTION COMMUNICATION SKILLS:

https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/reflections-communication.pdf

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT RESOLUTION

https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/relationship-conflict-resolution.pdf

I STATEMENTS

https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/i-statements.pdf

FAIR FIGHTING RULES

https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/fair-fighting-rules.pdf